TUGBOAT
Do not try this at home. Remember, this is a professional captain.
The towboat is approaching the bridge with barges loaded with coal.
This frame gives you an idea of how fast the river is running. Obviously at or near flood stage
Oh CRAP!!! The bridge didn't open and the boat can't stop. Notice that the tug has released the barges.
He is backing as hard as possible to try and avoid a collision with the bridge.
Can't back down enough against the current.
Uh Oh! The current has swung the boat around sideways.
The cook thinks maybe something isn't quite right.
The boss is going to be REAL mad!
Uh... Boss? Do we have flood insurance on this boat?
Uh.... Boss? You ain't gonna believe what we just did!
She's low, but the flag is still flying.
The wheelhouse door and the door in the second deck are now open. Look close at the bottom righthand side of the picture and you will see that the bridge guardrail is underwater.
Look at the water pouring out of the second deck doorway.
The working deck is still underwater, but rising.
Notice anything unusual? Look at the smoke coming from the exhausts. This thing is running!!!
Notice the propwash at the rear of the tug. The boat is upright and back under power.
Ho Hum. Just another day on the river.
Crisco
An old lady is walking around in a supermarket calling out,
"Crisco, Crisssssssco!"
Soon a store clerk approaches and says, "Lady, the Crisco is in aisle D"
The old lady replies, "Oh, I'm not looking for the cooking stuff.
I'm calling my husband."
The clerk is astonished. "Your husband's name is Crisco?"
The old lady answers, "Oh no, no, no. I only call him that when we're out in public."
"I see," said the clerk. "What do you call him at home?"
"Lard ass."
Bill Gates' High School Address Love him or hate him, he sure hits the nail on the head with this!
To anyone with kids of any age, here's some advice. Bill Gates recently gave a speech at a High School about 11 things they did not and will not learn in school. He talked about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.
Rule 1: Life is not fair -- get used to it!
Rule 2: The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
Rule 3: You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.
Rule 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.
Rule 5: Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping -- they called it opportunity.
Rule 6: If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.
Rule 7: Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent's generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.
Rule 8: Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools they have abolished failing grades and they'll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
Rule 9: Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.
Rule 10: Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to work at jobs.
Rule 11: Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
In closing: If you agree, pass this message on. If you can read this - Thank a teacher! If you are reading it in English - Thank a soldier!! If you live in North America, thank GOD!!!!!
 |
 |
|
Other Sites of Interest http://www.thehungersite.com - Feed a hungry kid,
it's free. |
|
[
About Us ]
[ Business To Business Sites ]
[ Retail Sites ]
[ Contact us ] [ Client Access ] [ Press ] [ Events ] [ Home ] [ Logos ] [ Request For Quote ] [ Removable Tattoos ] [ Cyberwinks ] [ Tattoo Trading Cards ] [ Retail Tattoos ] [ Whozy Woozy ] [ Sneaker Art ] [ Tattoo Hangtags ] [ Scooz ] [ TIC ] [ Tattoo Greeting Cards ] [ Friday Joke ] © 1998 Chris Co. Inc. |