1) Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself............Mark Twain
2) I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle..........Winston Churchill
3) A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul................George Bernard Shaw
4) A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money.............G. Gordon Liddy
5) Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner..............James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)
6) Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries........Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University
7) Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.................P.J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian
8) Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else............Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)
9) Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it..........Ronald Reagan (1986)
10) I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts................Will Rogers
11) If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free..........P.J. O'Rourke
12) If you want government to intervene domestically, you're a liberal. If you want government to intervene overseas, you're a conservative. If you want government to intervene everywhere, you're a moderate. If you don't want government to intervene anywhere, you're an extremist.......Joseph Sobran, Former Editor of the National Review (1995)
13) In general, the art of government consists in taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other.........Voltaire (1764)
14) Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you..........Pericles (430 B.C.)
15) No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.....Mark Twain (1866)
16) Talk is cheap ... except when Congress does it.......Unknown
17) The government is like a baby's alimentary canal, with a happy appetite at one end and no responsibility at the other.........Ronald Reagan
18) The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of socialism is the equal sharing of misery........Winston Churchill
19) The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.......Mark Twain
20) The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.........Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)
21) There is no distinctly native American criminal class, , , , , , save Congress.......Mark Twain
22) What this country needs are more unemployed politicians........Edward Langley, Artist (1928 - 1995)
23) A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.........Thomas Jefferson, Famous Revolutionary
24) They're all liars.........Bob Thorne
"Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night."
Rodney Dangerfield
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL."
Lynn Lavner
"Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope."
Camille Paglia
"Sex is one of the nine reasons for incarnation. The other eight are unimportant."
George Burns
"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship."
Sharon Stone
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps."
Tiger Woods
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
Jack Nicholson
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter how bad it is."
Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady, and you didn't think Barbara had a sense of humor)
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet."
Robin Williams
"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place."
Billy Crystal
"According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful."
Robert De Niro
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
Dustin Hoffman
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because men think, 'I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody naked'."
Jerry Seinfeld
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."
Robin Williams
"It's been so long since I've had sex, I've forgotten who ties up whom."
Joan Rivers
"Sex is one of the most wholesome, beautiful and natural experiences money can buy."
Steve Martin
"Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same."
Oscar Wilde
"It isn't premarital sex if you have no intention of getting married."
George Burns
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